Your Child Will Follow Your Example, Not Your Advice

 

 My pops favorite saying was “don’t do as I do, do as I say”. Trust me when I tell you that didn’t work out well for him or for me. As much as I didn’t want to, I ended up making a lot of the same mistakes my pops made in his life. I did a lot of things he did that he shouldn’t have, it was like a curse. As I got older I seen the patterns or at least figured them out the best I could as I didn’t get to know my grandfather very well. I only heard all the stories but that was enough to put two and two together.

 I definitely did not want any of my children following in my footsteps when it comes to my early days. My daughter caught a good glimpse of the tail end of my dark days. But she did also witness a big part of my transition. I had full custody of her when I was working and going to college full time. I am grateful she has done well for herself. In the time that she lived with me I was more of a do as I do AND as I say type of dad. Everything I said I could assure her I was speaking from experience as I would walk her through to the end results of making wrong decisions. She would get pretty wide eyed as she learned the reality of making a wrong decision. What takes you a minute to decided can take you years to undo, sometimes it can cost you your entire life. 

 I had always wanted another child. I had pretty much given up on the idea when along came my son. As happy as I was a lot of mixed emotions hit me as I thought, I am in my 50’s. What kind of father can I be in my 50’s I thought. Well the answer came to me pretty quick, A DAMN GOOD ONE! 

 Choosing to adopt a healthier lifestyle was all about me believe me. Sure I had to want it. I had to want it more than anything. Looking down at my little new born son was definitely what pushed me the hardest into making the right decision. I know we all gotta go when our time is up no ifs ands or buts about it. But living the way I was, I was definitely heading towards an early grave. If I at least tried my best who knows? If I could prolong the enviable even by a month, or a year I thought yes it would be worth it. I wanted to do everything I could to be around for as long as I possibly could for myself, my wife and my children.

 Not only did I want to live healthier in hopes of sticking around longer, I also wanted to set the best example for my children that I possibly could. I watched my pops nearly drink himself to death and I followed suit. Hell I almost beat him to the grave tilting bottles. I give thanks that we both wised up. 

 The most satisfying aspect thus far about adopting this new healthy lifestyle is seeing my son following close behind. He doesn’t train with me everyday, but he comes out when ever he wishes and he loves it. He seems to really be taking to the martial arts which is just awesome. He loves Bruce Lee which was one of my heroes growing up. He loves hanging out in the kitchen with me as I cook or cut up fruit to juice or make smoothies. He absolutely loves fruits and vegetables. Gotta love that a 3 year old chooses cherry tomatoes over cookies. He also loves me to read to him. He likes when I read him his books, but he really loves when I read to him from whatever book I’m reading. 

 Like I have said and I will say it again and again the benefits of adopting a healthier lifestyle are limitless. It is amazing to see just how much we influence our children as well as other in our lives. I wasn’t always hip to this but I surly am now. Thank you for reading